look what you've done

Crazy month indeed.

2011 is almost gone, it's been a crazy year for me. Hectic like crap that i don't even know how i managed to pull through all this shit. Met lotsa new people and some of them became great friends of mine. At the same time, I noticed that there are way many inconsiderate, selfish, greedy, self-centred people in this world. Sometimes, I don't wanna stereotype, people might say things about them, but they failed to prove us wrong. I am so sorry to say, you did not earn respect from me and failed to stop me from stereotyping you because you asked for it. People may say, ' if you can't beat them, join them' but nah! this will never happen, being like one of them? I might as well just fking kill myself. To me it should be 'If you can't beat them, bear with them' lol!


Many things have changed and one funny decision changed everything. Life's funny, I've been living in my own world, doing the things that I'm comfortable with and have been really reluctant to change my lifestyle. Being labelled as lifeless and anti-social, i actually kinda miss the lifeless me, where staying at home and doing nothing can make me happy. I miss that lazy life. It's not like I am unhappy with whatever I am doing now, it's just a thought that will cross my mind when I stop and ask myself 'What have I gotten myself into?' Made lotsa impetuous decisions this year, I don't know if it's the right thing to do, lets just hope everything will turn out to be fine and I am just the usual 'think-too-much' me.

I could've chosen an easy life, let everything remain the same, get my degree and work like nobody's business but I don't know what happened to me, I just decided to go crazy and did something I'd never thought I would do and I actually like it. One random thing about me, it's always hard to get me started to do something, but once I've gotten into it, I will eventually enjoy it and refuse to stop. Funny huh?

I am always worried and paranoid about changes that I'll have to make. ' What if this?' 'What if that?'. Always afraid of the negative consequences that these changes will bring to me. Life is too short to be worried, but you will never stop worrying about stuff. It's contradicting but it's true. Being the one who's super reluctant to leave her comfort zone, I must say I should give myself a big applause for making all these decisions. Might not mean anything to the others, but it's like something that would require lotsa courage from me to do it. I may be regretting it now, but I am sure sometimes after this, I will be writing a blog post telling people how silly I was to worry bout all these things. (At least I hope I'll be able to do it)

Just watched the last episode of How I met Your Mother S6, yeah, i am few months late, if only I watched this earlier. I find this line particularly true.

'The future is scary, but you can't run back to the past because it's familiar.'

Yeah, future is fking scary because everything is uncertain. The more you avoid uncertainty, the less likely you will take risk and the more reluctant you will want to change, therefore, you will choose to live under a more rigid and standardised rules. In conclusion, a dull life. It's not supposed to be applied this way i suppos because it's supposed to be a theory to explain why people adopt different accounting practices haha, learned from accounting theory (probably one of the most useless units which i will fail).

Btw, exam is over, probably another 2 weeks for me to stone then i will have to start my internship. ada scary! yea! I am worried again! But well....everything will turn out for be fine like how it will always be? =D